Calling In the Creatives Who Never Get the Invite

and the Signs You’re Not a Cult Favorite (But Still That Btch)*

Today, I cried.

Not because I didn’t know this was a pattern.

Not because I didn’t expect it—if I’m honest, I kinda did.

But because it still hurts.

It hurts to show up for people, to root for them out loud, to repost, reshare, re-encourage, to tell them they’re brilliant…

only to find out there was a project.

A party.

A collab.

A celebration.

And your name wasn’t on the list.

You weren’t even thought of.

It’s the kind of pain that feels childish and deep at the same time.

Like being the last one picked for the team.

Or never getting a Valentine in class.

It’s not about ego. It’s about belonging.

It’s about care.

It’s about the kind of community that you pour into—and realizing, too often, you’re pouring alone.

The Cult of Personality (And Why You Don’t Belong in One)

A friend once said,

“A lot of these scenes? It’s a cult of personality.”

And I realized…

I don’t have the personality that fits a cult.

I’m not a follower. I don’t flatter to gain favor. I don’t play soft to be palatable. I don’t beg to be seen.

Maybe that’s why I’m not invited.

Maybe that’s why they forget me.

Maybe that’s why I feel like I’m always on the edge of community—close enough to witness the joy, far enough to never fully be in it.

But here’s the truth: I’m not built to be a favorite. I’m built to be a force.

Signs You’re Not a Cult Favorite (But Still That Bitch)

1. You support from the shadows.

You clap when no one else does. You buy the book before it trends. You celebrate people before they’re poppin’. And they don’t always return the favor.

2. You challenge the vibe.

You’re not disruptive for fun, but you don’t nod along just to stay included. That makes people nervous. Cults prefer quiet.

3. You’re not shiny—you’re soulful.

And some folks only want surface. They want the “look.” You carry the depth. The legacy. The receipts. They can’t always handle that.

4. You won’t beg.

You might cry. You might get tired. But you will not shrink. And that’s what keeps you powerful, even when it’s lonely.

Still That Bitch. Even When It Hurts.

The real ones cry and still get back up.

The ones who aren’t chosen become the ones who choose themselves.

And that choice? It’s loud. Even when whispered.

So to the creatives who keep showing up, even when no one claps for you—

To the ones who love deeply, create boldly, and still get overlooked—

I see you. I am you.

And if nobody’s invited us to the pool party…

maybe we build our own damn ocean.